Segment 1. Fandango in-ring segment with Lillian Garcia. Satino Marella interrupts.

  • The announcers keep declaring how “Fandangoing” is taking over the world, and yet the camera crew can only seem to find four people in this entire University of Tennessee crowd doing it.
  • That being said, Fandangoing needs to die. For a couple of reasons: 1) As we saw on Monday when Raw was in South Carolina, some fans just don’t get it. If it’s not going to truly catch on everywhere Fandango….uh, goes, then what’s the point? It would be worse than John Cena’s mixed reactions. Indifference in entertainment is death. So Fandango, as a heel, should be critical of Fandangoing . I think it’s the right move by WWE. 2) I don’t mean die entirely. Lively crowds, especially those with a heavy European influence, will do it right and that’s all a heel like Fandango needs right now. It’s something that keeps him and WWE relevant, but his character doesn’t have to fully embrace because…he’s a heel. He’s too early in his gimmick to turn face and start playing along with the fans.
  • Speaking of Fandango being a heel, his segment with Lillian Garcia was money. He really is a talented performer. Unfortunately, I still don’t think we’ve seen his best in the ring. His Mania match with Jericho got a little sloppy on the finish. Perhaps when Jericho returns, they can re-visit their feud and we’ll finally get to see what he can do as a wrestler.
  • Santino did his best to shit on the entire segment with his terrible comedy, but Fandango still came out a winner.

Last Word: WIN!

Segment 2. Fandango def. Santino. Booker T accuses Teddy Long backstage of surging his authority. Big Show thanks Teddy for giving him a partner tonight.

  • The match was nothing special, but the right guy won.
  • The Booker T-Teddy Long friction can go a couple of ways, if Booker gets tired of being GM it gives WWE and way to write him out of the role. If he doesn’t, then all of this intrigue probably won’t go anywhere and will just be forgotten. In the meantime, it’s been entertaining to watch due to the fact that Teddy Long is actually a very good performer. I was watching the NWA when he made the jump from referee to heel manager and became one of the most entertaining parts of their program at the time. I know he grew stale in the Smackdown GM role but being at it for so long and having nothing worthwhile to do, that was bound to happen.

Last Word: WIN!

Segment 3. New United States Champion Kofi Kingston def. Intercontinental Champion Wade Barrett. Mark Henry gets attacked backstage by Sheamus.

  • Announcers trying to sell this champion vs champion match as something “rare.” That alone makes this entire segment an epic fail. There’s no such thing as “rare” in WWE anymore. Not when we see the same match-ups between the same ten people three times a week!
  • It wasn’t a bad match.  Even from a psychological standpoint.  But a champion vs. champion match should be more meaningful, not just a throwaway on the company’s “B” show that no one’s going to remember.  And the fact that Wade Barrett loses practically every week to non-champions, makes it mean even less.
  • The Mark Henry – Sheamus thing still doesn’t make sense to me.  Read my review form last week.  The same sentiments still apply.

Last Word:  FAIL!

Segment 4.  Replay of Raw: Alberto Del Rio’s challenge to Dolph Ziggler, Swagger’s attack on ADR, Swagger’s victory over Dolph in a non-title match.

  • I’ve said it before, enough with the replays!  This would be the first of four (yes, FOUR!) replays from last Monday’s Raw.  If you’re going to force us to sit through  non-sensical booking, at least make the show shorter and save those of us who have to watch it for purposes of writing reviews a little time!

Last Word:  FAIL!

Segment 5.  Alberto Del Rio vs. Jack Swagger, Part One.

  • These two really do have excellent chemistry together and their styles compliment each other well.

Last Word:  WIN!

Segment 6.  Del Rio def. Swagger

  • Apparently a triple threat match for the World Heavyweight Championship has been signed for Extreme Rules involving these two and Dolph Ziggler.  So Del Rio getting the win is typical 50/50 booking by WWE.  Swagger beats Ziggler, enhancing his standing in the match, so Del Rio needs to beat Swagger.  On paper, it seems to make sense.  But in reality, because there is so much WWE on tv, the too many top workers are losing too often, which waters down the significance of the entire product.
  • All of that aside, this was better than their WrestleMania match and a good showcase of wrestling for Smackdown.

Last Word:  WIN!

Segment 7.  Replay from Raw:  Ryback’s promo & face-off with John Cena.  Shield promo.

  • I feel turning Ryback heel is a HUGE mistake by WWE.  So I can’t in all good conscience give this segment a win even though the Shield’s promo, in which they called out the Undertaker who they will face along with Team Hell No Monday in a six-man tag match, was pretty good.

Last Word:  FAIL!

Segment 8.  Great Khali, Hornswoggle & Natalya def. Primo, Epico & Rosa Mendes.  Replay from Raw:  CM Punk’s promo.

  • A pre-recorded video revealed that apprently this match was the result of a disagreement over….(wait for it)….a parking space.  That tells you pretty much all you need to know about the prospects of these six individuals’ careers.
  • Seeing as how they’re matched up with each other every week, do they really need a reason?
  • I love how opponents have to run into Khali’s fist in order for him to make sure he connects in something that’s at least close to a  realistic amount of time.

Last Word:  FAIL!

Segment 9.  Replay from Raw:  Brock Lesnar destroys 3MB, challenges Triple H to a rematch at Extreme Rules.

  • Entire segments devoted to a replay get an automatic FAIL from me.

Last Word:  FAIL!

Segment 10.  Main Event:  Randy Orton & Sheamus vs. Big Show & Mark Henry

  • This entire “rivalry” has failed to do anything other than make me a bigger fan of Big Show and less of a fan of Sheamus.  I can understand Randy Orton being self-serving and accepting whatever advantages he can get because that’s his character.  But the way Sheamus tries to come across as a noble, tough guy yet attacks people when they aren’t looking and accepts a handicap match so he and another guy can beat up on an outnumbered heel, is so totally contrary to anything I’d want to cheer for.
  • The action in this match was standard.  I would’ve been more accpeting of it had I cared more about any of the participants.

Last Word:  FAIL!

Segment 11.  Show & Henry def. Orton & Sheamus

  • The best part about this match was when the match was over, the show ended.  No run-ins by The Shield or four-way brawls.  Simply, the Main Event is over, Goodnight.  So few shows end this way anymore that it’s refreshing when it happens.  Not so much though that it makes up for a Main Event that I could give two shits about.

Last Word:  FAIL!

FINAL VERDICT:  This week’s episode of WWE Smackdown is a FAIL!

POINTS OF PRAISE

  1. Lord of the Dance.  WWE could really get caught up in this hoopla over Fandango’s entrance and royally screw-up the character but they haven’t.  He’s continuing to be brought along slowly and strong.  I don’t know what the ultimate pay-off is, but for now, he’s one of the best things about WWE because he’s a true, old-school heel who hates the fans, loves himself, and doesn’t care what people think.

CHIEF COMPLAINTS

  1. What’s the Matter?  When it comes to listing my chief complaints, the question is really, where to begin?  But the principle reason this week’s show failed was because of my utter lack of interest.  Why should I care about a “rare” champion vs. champion match when I know it isn’t rare at all?  We’ve seen that plenty of times.  Kofi Kingston beats Wade Barrett?  Who cares?? EVERYBODY beats Wade Barrett!  Two “good guys” can beat up on one bad guy last week but this week the bad guy has a partner who hardly does anything in their match and all of a sudden the good guys can’t beat him?  How am I supposed to care about these “good guys” when apparently there’s nothing “good” about them??  Six people, three of whom aren’t even wresters (I’ll let you decide which three I mean), fighting over a parking space??  Are you fucking kidding me?!  I’m supposed to care about this when the same six assholes wrestler each other on practically every show already anyway???
  2. Replayed Raw.  If the Raw replays had been cut, it would’ve saved me at least a half hour, putting Smackdown at just the right length for a wrestling show in the first place (ninety minutes).  I’d much rather see something original than shit that wasn’t that interesting in the first place and happened only four days ago.  Don’t worry WWE,  I haven’t forgotten what happened on Raw.  Despite how hard I’ve tried!

As much as I’ve tried to convince people that Smackdown is the superior show, I’m afraid it really is no better than Raw.  It’s a crapshoot week-in and week-out.  It’s only consistent saving grace is the fact that won’t take as long to watch.  However, the current state of WWE booking right now makes pretty much all of their product a crapshoot.  It’s unfortunate because there’s so much talent on the roster right now being overlooked in favor of replays and meaningless matches we’ve all seen countless times.

That’s the last word for now, wrestling fans.  Until next week, go watch some classic stuff and try to wash the taste of this week’s episode from your mouths.  And don’t forget to make your opinons heard by leaving your comments below.  I’m out!

[Follow the Smartest Man Not In Professional Wrestling, “Handsome” Dan Lopez on Twitter @DansLastWord.  Also, check out his personal blog page, “Handsome” Dan’s Last Word.]

Advertisements